Baby, I am HOT!

Yes, I AM! When I put on a little sexy black dress, beautiful shoes, some make up, some perfume, a sexy smile - oooh, I am hot! But when on top of that I get my Hot Flash - you just hold on, baby, I am smokin'! It's good to get them when you are most proud - it teaches humility. That's what I tell myself, hoping that no one around notices.
I like getting them when I run, because then it doesn't matter, as I am already half-naked, red and dripping sweat, hoping that my urethra can hold its own against the bladder for another mile.
The Hot Flashes during the night have a character of their own. Hard to explain how offensive it can be to fall back asleep in the detestably wet sheets after one of those. But I am so desperate for sleep, I don't care. And then, in the middle of the night, my little baby crawls in my bed and I pray that she's too sleepy to notice the sheets, even though she notices that I am wearing a nighty different from the one I went to bed in (that one and the two more after it are long in the laundry). Sleep is overrated anyway. Thank Latin America and Africa for my coffee. Oh, shoot, I am not supposed to drink coffee, as it (allegedly) induces hot flashes! What else can I do to keep my eyes open????

But as I read on about the hot flashes and what other women experience, I start to clearly see the reality:
a. Mine are not the worst. Apparently, there are women who pass out during hot flashes.
b. You can try forever all sorts of homeopathic and pharmaceutical remedies and hope that one of them would help more than would hurt you, and most-likely by the time you find it, your hot flashes will be gone naturally.
c. I can actually get used to them! I almost missed them when I didn't have them for 3 weeks last summer, which usually happens when they are replaced by an occasional menstruation (but that's for another blog...)

Women's Health Initiative has been conducting several large studies under the watchful eyes of the FDA and NIH - fun bed-time read: http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/whi/e-a_faq.htm.
Ladies, do not despair! There've been no deaths reported. Unless you are hit by a Hot Flash and pass out while running on a busy street!