Green Eggs and Ham - The Menopause Edit

A verse came to mind the other night, as I was laying in my bed awaken yet again by 'The New Age'. The verse kept unfolding into something painfully familiar, but since my brain is fried with sleepless nights, it took me a while to remember where I'd heard it before. So here is my version of the popular poem, without its happy ending, I am afraid...

Do you like
Hot Flash and Sweats?

I do not like
Hot Flash and Sweats.

Would you like them
Here or there?

I would not like them
here or there.
I would not like them
anywhere.

Would you like them
in your bed?
Would you like them
make you red?

I do not like them
in my bed.
I do not like them
make me red.
I do not like them
here or there.
I do not like them
anywhere.
I do not like Hot Flash and Sweats.
I do not like this Meno-duet!


Would you like them
on a date?
Would you like them
with a friend?

Not on a date.
Not with a friend.
Not in the bed.
Don’t make me red.
I would not like them here or there.
I would not like them anywhere.
I do not like Hot Flash and Sweats.
I do not like this Meno-duet!

Would you? Could you?
In a car?
Get them! Get them!
Here they are.

I would not,
could not,
in a car!

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them
When you pee.
I would not, could not when I pee.
Not in a car! You let me be.


Say!
In the dark?
Here in the dark!
Would you, could you, in the dark?

I hate them, hate them
in the dark.

Would you, could you,
in the rain?

I would not, could not, in the rain.
Not in the dark. Not on a train,
Not in a car, Not while I pee.
I really hate them, don’t you see?
Not in my bed. Not getting red.
Not on a date. Not with a friend.
I will not have them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere!

You do not like
Hot Flash and Sweats?

I really hate this Meno-duet.

And while a full night sleep is still just a hope, I am finding a new calling - poetry!